In 2017, I started delegating little chores to my young children. I wanted to cultivate a habit of responsibility and an eye for service, so I taught them to tidy up and prepare simple foods (more here). Every year, I have taken their responsibilities up a notch.
Four years in, my elementary-age kids were doing as much work around here as I was. Every day, we listened to music together while we prepped meals, swept floors, wiped counters and washed dishes. Every week, each toted an audiobook while he or she emptied trashcans, swept the stairs, gathered eggs, scrubbed rabbit waterers or spread birdseed. I kept my list of each child’s chores and reminded them (over and over) to do them.
In fact, I spent a lot of time reminding kids to do things. I wondered, if I hop off of this merry-go-round, will it keep going? Can I delegate not only the chores, but the leadership of completing them? I saw that we had cultivated a sense of responsibility, but I wanted to cultivate independence too.
So, I created an individualized check list for each child and slid them into their schoolwork folders. I included not only their chores, but also their homeschool assignments, health and hygiene reminders, piano practice and quiet time.
It took a few weeks to gain traction, but I was stubborn, and now we are reaping the benefits. I still guide my younger children through their days, but the big kids lead themselves. Unanimously, we all prefer this checklist system to my nagging!
With their schedules in their own hands, each child has found a routine he or she likes best. One spreads his weekly chores throughout the week and another packs them all into one afternoon; one takes her quiet time before breakfast and another takes it between afterschool tasks. Of course, certain chores are pinned to mealtimes and school work must be done before playtime; also, they attend our morning collective when I ring the bell. But, for the most part, the kids manage their own time.
Twice a day, I say, “Everybody, show me your lists,” and most of the time I am satisfied. They have become more focused and prompt, knowing that fast work means longer free time. They have discovered the freedom that comes with reliability and are developing a work ethic that they will carry into future endeavors.
I add to their chores every few months and rotate them so that everyone gains each skill. Before they leave my home, I want them all to know how to sweep a room, scrub a soup pot, do the laundry, clean the toilets and cook. For now, they unload the dishwasher and sort from the dryer; but when they are taller, they will load both. For now, they fry eggs and bake quick breads; but when they are older, they will each be assigned a weeknight to make dinner.
Nowadays, the kids clean up after meals with little help from me. In fact, sometimes I read the toddler a book while they work! And most nights after tucking them in, I come downstairs to a clean living room and kitchen. They are becoming self-led workers.
NOTE: Do not come away from this post thinking my house is 100% clean 100% of the time. Honestly, I do not think that lifestyle would be healthy and we practice grace around here. Also, do not think that my children work constantly. Since we homeschool, my children are not coming home from a full day of school, extracurriculars and homework to a big chore list. We can integrate these tasks into their days and leave over two hours for free time every afternoon. I will never give them so much work that they lose those precious two hours to pursue their own endeavors.
You can open the my fall 2022 list as an editable document here or my 2023 document here.
Read about how I started implementing chores here. If you have a question, post it in the comments.
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