This letter to my 10-month-old daughter is part of the Letters to My Children Series. In each child’s journal, I write prayers, encouragement, advice and little memories for them to read later.
Sweet Baby,
Tonight, you and I laid on my bed silently staring at one another, faces an inch apart, for a long wonderful time. You intermittently covered my nose and cheeks with big wet open-mouth kisses. “Mama, I love you so much I gotta… I gotta… eat your face!” You can’t talk yet, but that is what your body language is loudly saying. Now you are sleeping beside me while I write in your journal. Someday, we’ll have late-night discussions instead of late-night stare sessions; sitting smiling at each other like this would be too awkward. I look forward to those talks, but this short silent year with little you is special. I cherish memories of holding you two hours a day in the NICU. I’d undress you and carefully arrange you (and your wires) on my skin and your nurse tucked us in with warm blankets, then you’d lean back and stare up at me so intently as long as you could. I looked forward to those few precious minutes every day… before your eyelids drooped and you settled onto my bosom then zonked out utterly. Nurses told me you never slept so hard in your little bed as you did on me- mommy’s skin does that. Those memories and these memories will always be so special to me and I believe that, even though you wont remember them, they are a part of who you are becoming. I won’t regret dropping everything to just stare at you. I will treasure you always.
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